Monday, February 4, 2013

The NFL Didn't Want the Lights to Go Out, Just So You Know

(Warning: Sarcasm) Just in case you thought the blackout was a planned embarrassment for the NFL, they released a statement assuring you that it wasn't. They even get into the girtty details and say that an "abnormality in the system" caused the 34-minute blackout.

I'm glad they told us that, otherwise I would have thought that it was normal for the power to go out, and it was all planned so the awkward CBS reporters could get more air time. One might have also been confused and thought the abnormality wasn't in the system, but instead in some sort of bird or small insect thousands of miles a way.

With this statement, the NFl really cleared up any and all confusion that could possibly arise from this situation.
(To me, this seems like something Buster from Arrested Development would say. "Well, obviously something went wrong and the lights went out.")

To make matters worse, they're also letting us know they had a back up generator the whole time. They were just about to turn it on, and then the lights came back on. So yeah, it was a total success all around.

Possible story behind the prolonged blackout: There was some old janitor guy who hadn't kept up the backup generator, and knew it was going to fail. So when the lights went of, he made up tons of excuses, getting progressively stupider, to not use the backup, and then, just as the head guy in the suit was about to flip on the backup generator and find that the janitor guy had failed at his job, the normal lights came back on.